Part 128: Cafu NPC Chatter 2

Welcome back! Last time, we got to Cafu and spoke to everyone outside. Time to engage the time-honored JRPG tradition of breaking into everyone's houses.



: For example, I used to put a fruit on my little brother's head so I could have a target for my shuriken.

: Sheesh, what's so bad about that? With your skill, you probably goofed and hurt your little brother. Right?

: Heh heh. Yeah, my little brother sure was mad, there on the bed, after they took out the shuriken....

: So, uh, you really hurt the guy? That's pretty sad, dude.

His intro may be annoying, but Rapp redeems himself quickly.

: Rapp! Are you teaching our kids to get into mischief again?! I don't know what to do about you! Just remember... you're going to be the next village leader! I swear... every day... every day...!

: Yeah yeah. You grown-ups are always on my case! Me? Village leader? Ha! No way!

: If you do ever get to be leader, you'll have to tone down that foul mouth of yours!

: Hey, I said "no way", didn't I? I'm not gonna be leader! Try opening your ears for a change!

Let's head upstairs, shall we?



: I want to be like big brother Rapp as soon as I can!

: No, that's not it, Hakka. To be a big tough guy, you gotta say "I want to be ever greater than big brother Rapp".

: Yeah, but it's hard 'cuz my Mom and sister watch me like hawks. If my sister met you, she would get in a fight with you. I sure wish I could do something about that.



: You don't know what you're talking about! Hakka here is just tagging along. Anyway, I'm the one who always gets scolded, so don't worry about your brother.

: So you've gained some skills and have been recognized as a grown-up. Just don't get a big head over it! Anyway, you're breaking our laws and running around with outsiders! Makes me wonder what'll become of you!

: Haven't you noticed? These here folks are my guests.



That... that kinda came out of nowhere. Next house!



: What's wrong with you? ACK! What's with your face? It's all swollen and red?

: Oh, this? Well, you see, on my way back from the Petrified Forest....

: Wow, look at that! That's some face you got there! Ha ha!

: Last evening, I was lured by the aroma of honey coming from the trees when walking by.... I got stung by bees. When I woke up this morning, my face was like this.

: This stuff happens on adventures. I uh... I better be careful, too.

: Ugh. Oh, man. It hurts even worse if I touch it.

Bees, huh? Let's chat with the doc.

: Patients are coming in steady. I'm so busy that I don't even have time to eat.

: Yeah, you've got a big crowd here. It sure beats having zero customers!

: Stop talking nonsense. I'm a doctor. You're saying it's good for doctors to be busy?

: Hee hee hee... Dr. Alma said the same thing!

: They don't think of their injuries as such, so they don't accept treatment. Still, people come here every day. They want me to help them run faster. Or to look more beautiful! Or to be more intelligent! Hey, if that's what they want and they've got the time to come here, they should stay home and study! People in this village have the strange idea that doctors can fix anything. Oh, what'll I do?

Sounds like quite the problem you've got there. Let's talk to the kid in purple.

: I bet if Rapp chases those guys out of the tower, then the Spirits will come back!

: Hey, what's wrong with you? You get hurty during training again?

: Yeah! I wanna chase away those tower people as soon as possible! My grandpa says I cant' go to the tower because it's against the law. But going there's the right thing to do, isn't it? We'll get even with those guys sometime!

: You bet! We're gonna band together some day and get rid of those guys!

Whoops, I think we've just made the doctor's problem worse.

: Rapp, you went back to the Petrified Forest, right? And you know what kind of place it is? Once you're turned to stone, even the doctor can't put you back to normal. The children would suffer greatly if ever you were turned to stone.

: Yeah, I know. I know!

: But, if nobody goes to visit them, won't our petrified friends be lonely?

Hmm. Good point.

On that note, let's head upstairs.



: Hey, you got nothin' to worry about. Worried about his condition? He has one foot in the grave already.

: This old man wouldn't die even if he was killed! Heh heh heh!

: You're all bluff, aren't you? I saw how you turned all pale and ran for help when he collapsed.

: N-No, you got it all wrong. Uh... I uh, I just wanted a quick look at how his face looked when he died!



: Those lousy, evil people who did this. Rapp, don't let those outsiders get any closer to me.

: Huh? What's wrong? Hey, these are my guests. They've got nothin' to do with your hand!

: People like them were in the tower. And they turned my left hand to stone. So I don't trust ANY outsiders!



Dammit, the doctor was just telling me about you.

: He fixes up my eyes, shapes up my nose, and gives me a dynamite figure! I get giddy just thinking about it!

: Can Cafu's doctor really do all that?!

: Nope, there's no way he can do all that!

: Ha ha! I'm going to be reborn! I'm gonna look so much better with my red hair and my beautiful bod! ♥ Hey, Rapp, you could get the doctor to turn your friends into Cafunians! Then they won't be outsiders any more!

: Can Cafu's doctor do such a thing?!

: NOOO WAAAAAY!

: Huh? You want to become a Cafunian?! Nobody'd be calling you an outsider! Hey, that doctor can do anything!

: Why don't you go on home? You're not sick, so why stay here and get in everyone's way?



: We sure wish Rapp would play with us more often.

: Hee hee. Rapp sure is popular, wherever he goes.

: But next time, Rapp's gonna play with us. He promised!

: Just leave it up to me.

: Hee hee. OK! So, we'll just play here at this man's place until big brother comes to play with us!



Sounds legit.

: This one here latches onto your scalp and sends roots into your head to draw out nutrients. Fascinating!

: Boy oh boy. Yet another useless research project!

: OK, what about his mushroom? If you boil it, it melts the pot! Grill it and there's a huge explosion! Eat it raw and you're dead in a flash! It releases its spores at night, and the spores leave a mess of black mold. So here's a mushroom you can't boil, can't grill, and can't eat! Haaah ha ha ha ha!



: As her son, I've gotta do my best to meet her expectations. It's not easy, though.

: Hey, you're a young man. How come you gotta do what your mother says all the time?

: I really don't want to disappoint my mother. But no matter how much I train, I can't get good enough.

Oh dear. Let's see what his mother has to say.

: I want my son to be the very best like no one ever was warrior, able to defeat even Rapp. That's why I go along with him to his training. Today, they're working on leg muscles. My son's legs are still a little weak. Basically, he needs more agility. You, even if I do say so myself, don't you think my son is quite handsome? That's why I think if he becomes the best warrior, he'll be the most eligible bachelor in the village! Hee hee! That will be interesting to see! Strong warriors must have strong legs. I have to keep my son working at it.

: If he needs agility, why doesn't he just grind up dagger or wind levels?



: If he tries using it for mischievous purposes, you can bet I'll put a stop to it.

All right, against my better judgement, let's go see what he's up to.

: Now let's see.... Crumble one charred newt, head first. Then gently let the Spirits unite.

: Hey, whatcha doing?

: Eh?! I heard a voice all of a sudden! Huh? You folks, you can see me?

: Of course I can see you! You're saying all kinds of weird stuff.

: Drat! Failed again! Hmm...? OK, next I'll burn some Chico leaves and I'll immerse myself in the fumes.

: So, as I was saying, what are you doing?

: Can't you tell? I'm doing research on disappearing.

: You mean, like a cloak of invisibility? Cool! If you figure it out, please teach me!

: If I can discover the secret of invisibility, just think of the things I could do! Heh heh heh. ♥

Oh dear.

: Something tells me he's got something up his sleeve.

: What, this guy, a troublemaker...?!

: I don't want to know!

: What's that? My husband is trying to make himself invisible again, so he can go cause mischief? Gyaaaah! That does it! You've got it coming now!



Y'know, maybe shit like this is why they don't like outsiders. Just a thought.



: Something to upset the Spirits...? Like maybe, they dumped a bunch of poison all around or burned a forest!

Shit! If only Ma-Ti were here....

: Yeah, I'll bet they did something like that and got the Spirits so mad that they went away! That's gotta be it! Dang it. We've got to do something to get those guys in the tower. But if we get too close to them, they'll turn us to stone in an instant just like the Petrified Forest. Ugh! I get jittery just thinking about it. Getting turned to stone! Nothing but stone!

Yeah, the NPCs here are fairly chatty.



But wait! There's more!

: Hey, you guys with the short ears! Did you really come from the tower?!

: Don't worry, Meesha. Those guys are important guests. They got nothin' to do with the tower.

: Oh, OK. I was kinda shocked at first. I'm sorry, Rapp. I'm sure that any guest of yours has got to be OK! I hardly ever go outside the village. Still, there's places I'd like to see.



Ahh, Rapp also uses the gender-neutral "dude". I approve.

Also: elf-ninjas who live in hollowed out fruit and speak in surfer slang are not the weirdest things we'll be encountering on this continent.

: Yeah... bit it's such fun to hear your stories about exploring and about the world outside our village. You guys have traveled to lots of places, huh? Wow, I'd love to do that, too.

Yep. Even here, a town where everyone hates us, we're still inspiring NPCs to go out adventuring.

: Hey, Rapp, do you still go to the Petrified Forest? It's nice that you visit your parents, but you must be careful about going into that forest.

: Yeah, I know all about it. So don't worry!

: If you get turned to stone too, your parents will surely get lonely. So be careful when you visit them.



Another common theme in Cafu is that the younger generation doesn't seem to care so much about Justin and Feena being outsiders.

: Girlfriend? Who, me? Gimme a break! She's Justin's girlfriend. They're both my guests.

: I'm Feena. I'm actually Justin's traveling companion, on an adventure. Nice to meet you.

: Hh-He-Hello, Feena. ♥ Um... I'm uh, I'm Rapp's friend. My name's Joel.

Nicky, Joel, Meesha, Hakka, and Rapp? Seriously, Cafu, pick a consistent theme with your names.

: Ha! Look at you, turning all red! Why, you little lover boy!

: Um, anyway, so you're Rapp's guest. I knew it would be weird if Rapp actually had a girlfriend. It's just that I was so surprised to see Rapp walking along with a girl.



: To get there, we gotta cross a forest full of monsters, right? I'd be kinda worried going alone.

: Ha ha. What a schmoozer! Yeah, sure, you can go with us.

: Heh heh. Thanks! Rapp is always so nice about this sort of thing.

All right, let's see what the other duder has to say.

: Hey, you see that wall over there? Rapp's shuriken left that mark. Since the village buildings are plants, marks like that heal up naturally. But this one hasn't changed a bit. That's how amazing Rapp is with the shuriken! No one else can leave a mark like that!

: Stop it! You're making my ears itch!

: He's the best hunter in the village. There ain't anyone who can compete with him!

And that's all there is. Until we talk to the Chief, anyway.



: Anyway, he started living in the old Cafu Village, in the Petrified Forest. Before long, he got turned to stone. He already got saved once, that fool. But, when you get right down to it, we'd all like to go back to Old Cafu.



I continue to be impeccable at making sure the NPCs I'm chatting with are visible.

: And what's great about getting married? You'll just have to put up with your wife's needs and demands.

: Ha ha ha! You don't get it yet, do you Rapp? Men change when they get a girlfriend! My goal is to make a happy home. But to do that, I've got to raise this fruit to be a good house.



: Yeah, well these guys are definitely not with those people in the tower.

: Why do you think that outsiders are your enemy just because of what happened in the Petrified Forest?

: Is the Petrified Forest really such a horrible place?

: Well... if you go there, you'll find out.

: Well, people weren't even talking much about outsiders before those people in the tower came.



: This is not easy to say, but there are no more Spirits in our forest. It's all I can conclude when I see what has happened there. The entire forest turned to stone. I will allow them, as guests, but they must not do anything that goes against our laws set by the Spirits.



: But ever since that incident with the people in the tower, I don't want to have anything to do with outsiders. I think it's best if you guys leave soon, before any trouble happens here. Rapp, have even you forgotten about the night the old village was turned to stone? Your parents were among....

: Of course I haven't forgotten, idiot! And you can bet that I'll get even with those guys in the tower, too!



: Oh... just to the Petrified Forest for a bit.

: Huuuh?! The Petrified Forest!? Hey, take me with you! OK? OK? Can I go with you?

: Sorry, not to the Petrified Forest. Hey, Nicky. WHen I say "no" it means "no". Got it? Huh, Nicky?

: If you say so. I'll just wait for ya. But... come back real soon, OK?



: Well, you can at least rest here. Even if that's all we can do for you.

I checked the map; there's no unused dinner conversations here. That's probably for the best.

And with that, we're done with Cafu for the time being. Tune in next time!